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injest
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from Gary I can remember being in the car with Dad one spring day a few years ago. It was clear and sunny, but the air was still quite cool -- it was only in the 50's -- and we saw two young men driving along the highway in a Jeep with the top open. In addition to that, both of them were shirtless. I was certainly enjoying the view. But the sight of them caused Dad's mind to run in a different track. He asked me, "Aren't those boys cold?" I said, "Sure they are, but neither one of them is going to admit it."
There is a reason the word "bravado" is in the dictionary. And it should be noted that men are not the only ones who pump up this system of male bullshit. Women often reward men for pretending to be tougher than what they are. I'll bet those two goofballs Dad and I saw barreling down the highway half dressed had to beat the girls off with a stick. I suspect a young man who was just as attractive, but dressed sensibly, waited until summer to remove the top of his Jeep, and openly wept while watching sad movies wouldn't be half as successful with the opposite sex.  young men are full of testorene and bravado...yes they are...and they are inherently sensual critters...and I said sensual..not SEXUAL..(although they are that too) our culture allows boys more freedom to experience and use their senses...those boys may have been cold..they may have been showing out for each other...and they may very well have been ENJOYING being cold, knowing how wonderful it would feel to get warm again. and girls wouldn't have cared when they took the roof off the Jeep...we don't care or think about that...and we wouldnt' care if he cried.. we would care very much if he boohooed like a big ol baby..but a tear or two? come on, the girls would be putting OUT over that one... |
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Milo
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men are not as stoic as they are being made out to be...they are just not as overt as women. If you get to know men well enough they are pretty transparent...ask anyone in a long term relationship and they will tell you, they can tell their mates mood without a word being spoken.
What happens is that men reserve their deeper emotions for those who have earned the right to share them. Not everyone is entitled to that level access. |
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injest
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What happens is that men reserve their deeper emotions for those who have earned the right to share them. Not everyone is entitled to that level access.
and this is a non pc point of view but. I think we are all the poorer for this whole "touchy feely" thing they want to foist on men... bear with me men are men, they are the warriors, the protectors, the sentries...the hunters. like it or not...they are. that is a man's nature. They may manifest these things in different ways but the base of a man is the above... and the more we muck around with nature the worse life is for all of us. It is just so irritating to hear the same people that maintain we should be hands off on the planet, advocating forcing a complete denial of nature in ourselves. and part of being a man is learning to control emotions...when you are getting shot at or chasing a bison across the plain, you can't stop to cry cause you broke a nail or didn't get a good night's sleep, or your lover didn't buy you a card on your anniversary..those men wouldn't survive to procreate...NATURE favors men that can control themselves... end of ramble...   |
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Milo
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That's right, Jess. And what I think is worse than the "getting in touch with your feminine side" bullshit, is the idea that aggression, competition, silence, discretion, etc. are being undermined and marginalized.
I for one am not interested in living with a country full of Metrosexuals and Emo Kids.
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injest
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That's right, Jess. And what I think is worse than the "getting in touch with your feminine side" bullshit, is the idea that aggression, competition, silence, discretion, etc. are being undermined and marginalized.
I for one am not interested in living with a country full of Metrosexuals and Emo Kids.
these two in particular are just HATED by the PC crowd...they can't see that we are made to compete..and aggression is a wonderful thing when channeled correctly. There are a lot of people that believe in peace....but it is the ones that are willing to defend that peace that allows it to exist in the first place (that is why everyone was ok with the wars for a while after 9-11..they wanted our warriors to fight them over THERE so they woulnd have to fight them HERE) Competition is what makes excellence. There would be no world records, no trips to the moon if there were no competition. Competition gives you a yardstick, something to measure and motivate you. this is why people are encouraged to get a walking partner or a workout partner, you go farther, and harder if you have someone to compare yourself to. |
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bradINblue
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That's right, Jess. And what I think is worse than the "getting in touch with your feminine side" bullshit, is the idea that aggression, competition, silence, discretion, etc. are being undermined and marginalized.
I for one am not interested in living with a country full of Metrosexuals and Emo Kids.
Yeah, well I agree with the 'feminine side' crap. just look at who was slinging that shit. Aggression and competition is being marginalized. IMO, two very important components of traditional maleness. Characteristics I love in men. I look at all my relatives--cousins, siblings, etc. We all came from very rural America. Most remain rural. Far away from the latte's, shopping malls, and metrosexuals. I can't begin to tell ya' how many of my cousins/nephews, as a result of being insulated from liberal, touchy-feely, and elitist urbana, excel in sports and find service in the uniform. Well, maybe I will tell you about my nephew Brandon. In June, he took first place in all three categories in the regional USA Wrestling regional championship in Idaho, after nailing 1st at the state level. Last week he went to Utah to compete in the ASICS USAW Kids Greco-Roman Nationals. He placed second in his class. He now has enough points in USA Wrestling's US Future Olympian rankings that he is a candidate for the Olympics in Australia. I'm so proud of the kid I can hardly stand it. Gotta give his dad, Bubba (no shit, my brother) lots of credit too. He is raising three fine boys, that's for sure, and yeah, they live in this tiny little town called Scappoose, Oregon. Thing is, these kids grow up (most of my cousins) away from the eliteness of the city and the PC crowd, and they actually have wonderful, in tact families. They're evenings are spent going to games after dinner. The guys coach. Weekends are spent at little league or softball competitions, etc. etc. Those city folks have no idea how great life can be. Instead, they thumb their noses at these hickibillies, and continue on comparing who has the biggest boat and the biggest house, all the while, going weeks without ever seeing their kids. Shame is what it is. Brad |
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« Last Edit: July 10, 2009, 01:25:17 am by bradINblue »
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The Maker keeps making but I finally broke through. I love you Steve.
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injest
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Yeah, well I agree with the 'feminine side' crap. just look at who was slinging that shit.
Thing is, these kids grow up (most of my cousins) away from the eliteness of the city and the PC crowd, and they actually have wonderful, in tact families. They're evenings are spent going to games after dinner. The guys coach. Weekends are spent at little league or softball competitions, etc. etc. Those city folks have no idea how great life can be. Instead, they thumb their noses at these hickibillies, and continue on comparing who has the biggest boat and the biggest house, all the while, going weeks without ever seeing their kids. Shame is what it is.
Brad
I was thinking about this yesterday. Life for those people are parties and bars..adults only. and they want their kids to grow up fast. Our lives though..out here in the 'sticks' is not centered on bars and adult activities. I would much rather get up early and hang out under the trees with other parents with a watermelon, a cooler of lemonade and fifteen kids and horses running wild around us than sleep til noon, wake up with a hangover and hit the bar as soon as it gets dark. socializing for us is men interacting with men, mothers gossiping and visiting (emoting all over the place), girls chasing and/or snubbing the boys..who are trying hard to pretend they don't notice while they try to imitate the postures and behaviour of their fathers... it's a good life. |
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MagicM
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Talking about boys bonding with all those outdoor activities as kids.
When I was a young girl I went everywhere with my brother Chris and came back home just as bloodied as he was - we regularly crashed our scooters and got into other scrapes. In those times we had total freedom to roam far and wild. One day we got stuck half way down a cliff and the neighbour had to rescue us. Another time we got charged by wild horses up on Radio Hill and had to dive into some prickle bushes to escape.
Mind you when we were playing with our friends Garth and Michael I got reminded of my status as a humble female. We had just constructed a raft which we were going to sail around New Zealand (we used to live in Wellington). The boys were going without me and I begged to go along too. Finally they decided to make a major concession and allow me along too - as long as I promised to do all the rowing!
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“Beauties in vain their pretty eyes may roll; charms strike the sight, but merit wins the soul.” Alexander Pope
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injest
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Talking about boys bonding with all those outdoor activities as kids.
When I was a young girl I went everywhere with my brother Chris and came back home just as bloodied as he was - we regularly crashed our scooters and got into other scrapes. In those times we had total freedom to roam far and wild. One day we got stuck half way down a cliff and the neighbour had to rescue us. Another time we got charged by wild horses up on Radio Hill and had to dive into some prickle bushes to escape.
Mind you when we were playing with our friends Garth and Michael I got reminded of my status as a humble female. We had just constructed a raft which we were going to sail around New Zealand (we used to live in Wellington). The boys were going without me and I begged to go along too. Finally they decided to make a major concession and allow me along too - as long as I promised to do all the rowing!
ouch!  |
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Milo
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I would much rather get up early and hang out under the trees with other parents with a watermelon, a cooler of lemonade and fifteen kids and horses running wild around us than sleep til noon, wake up with a hangover and hit the bar as soon as it gets dark.
Well, as long as one doesn't make a habit out of it... socializing for us is men interacting with men, mothers gossiping and visiting (emoting all over the place), girls chasing and/or snubbing the boys..who are trying hard to pretend they don't notice while they try to imitate the postures and behaviour of their fathers...
Urban family gatherings tend to spill out into the neighborhood. When I was a kid, whoever had cousins visiting would bring them out and introduce them to the other kids in the neighborhood, and we would all play together. Depending on the type of family event, kids from the neighborhood might be invited to stop in and grab a bite to eat. Back in September, we had a huge family reunion at my cousin's place in Baltimore. It was great, some of us more active adults played volleyball with the kids, and some of the older kids joined in games of Scrabble, and some card games. The pool was the major feature for the kids. Of course the old folks sat inside in the nice air-conditioned living room eating, drinking, and talking. I'm not sure what the gathering would have been like if the cousin hosting the reunion had a PS2 or a Wii. |
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